Fragmented Soul
by Havah Kinny
Summary: AU. When Shane Gray's parents are murdered, his godfamily, The Flynn's, take him in. He doesn't expect to ever overcome the tragedy that he has been forced to live through, but with the unexpected help of Jason Flynn, he just might be able to heal. Slash.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N Ok, so this is a new story, it is alternate universe and I hope that you enjoy it!

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"Jason, could you come here for a moment? We have to talk."

"What mom?" Jason walked into the kitchen, a saunter in his step and a confused look on his face.

"I need you to come sit down," she gestured from the table and Jason nodded. "Look," she took a deep breath. "One of the men that I work with was murdered in his home early yesterday morning, Craig Gray, I don't know if you remember or not, he brought his wife Charlotte for dinner once – anyways, last night someone broke into their home and, well, yeah." Jason could tell that his mom was trying to stay strong for him, but that didn't stop him from putting a comforting arm around her.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered.

"That's not all," she sighed. "Whoever it was left their son alive."

"Was he home?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "They beat him up, but in his statement he said that he was only injured because he was trying to protect his mother, they were going to leave him alone until he got in the way, it seems."

"Is he ok?"

"Yes," his mother nodded. "He's got some bruises and cuts, but most of the damage is emotional – you see, he doesn't have any other relatives, and, well your father and I are his god parents."

"You mean that…" Jason trailed off, unsure that he wanted to finish the question he had begun to ask.

"Well that's up to you, Jason. Your father and I have thought about this and we've decided to leave the choice up to you – just know that if we don't take this boy in, he'll be going to a foster home and then to god knows where."

"I can't believe you're asking me this," Jason sighed.

"What?"

"Right now he needs attention more than anything, there's no way he's going to a foster home."

"Oh, that's my Jason," his mother smiled and pulled him into a hug, kissing the top of his head. Normally he would have pulled away, telling her off so that she would leave him alone, but right now he didn't mind.

"What a shitty way to start summer vacation," Jason mused as he and his father waited for his mother to bring the new boy home. The Gray's had lived across the river, meaning that Shane, their son, had attended a different high school than Jason. Jason's mother had informed him that Shane was a year younger than him, and quite a bit different – Shane was quiet by nature, reserved, introverted, whereas Jason was loud, extroverted and friendly. He had promised to tone his tendencies down, though, because this new boy had been through something awful and he didn't need Jason's craziness.

"Remember, Jason, this boy-"

"Dad," Jason looked seriously at his father. "I know, ok? I fucking know that he's going to be shattered – if he wants to be alone, that's just fine with me. If he wants quiet company, I'll turn off the Flynn vocals."

"Thank you, Jason, I know that this means a lot to your mother, and it displays a very mature decision on your part-"

"They're here." Before Jason's father could continue, Jason cut him off, hearing the garage door go up. He tensed, but didn't get to his feet, that would be too eager and all together too much, so without being asked, he stayed on the chair in the living room where he had been sitting since his mother had left to go pick Shane up. It felt like hours before his mother finally entered the room, the new addition to the household in tow.

"This is Shane," she said, putting on gentle hand on the boy's shoulder. Jason's eyes scanned over him immediately. There was a mess of dark brown hair hanging over the boy's face, and he was looking down, making it hard to get a good look at his face. He was incredibly skinny and almost as tall as Jason, sporting jeans and a far too big hoodie, which was zipped up despite the warm weather. He was wearing a backpack and carrying a medium sized cardboard box in his hands. "Shane, this is my husband, Gregor, I believe you met him once at a party at your parent's house."

"Hello, how are you holding up?" Jason's father asked. The kid holding the box just shrugged.

"And this," Jason's mother gestured towards Jason. "Is my son, Jason."

"Jason," Jason said, nodding at Shane. "It's Jason." Shane offered a brief and pathetic excuse for a nod in Jason's direction.

"Alright, Jason why don't you take Shane upstairs and show him his room while you're father and I get the rest of the things from the car.

"Ok," Jason nodded and watched as his parents left for the garage. "Let me take that for you," Jason reached for the box, but Shane's arms tightened around it, and Jason shied away. "Sorry," he whispered. Shane said nothing. "Follow me," Jason said as he began to walk up the stairs. He didn't look behind, but the creaking of the steps let him know that Shane was behind him. "Ok, so this is your room," Jason pushed open the door of what had been their guest room. "I'm right across the hall if you need anything, or if you want to talk or listen to music or play any video games or really whatever," Jason shrugged. Again, Shane just nodded. "Do you want help unpacking?" Jason asked. Shane shrugged, and since it wasn't a shaking of the head, Jason took it as a yes.

"Alright, that's everything," Jason's father declared after setting the last of the two suitcases, guitar case and single box that had been brought from the van. Jason had been informed already that some of Shane's things were in a storage facility downtown and that he was only bringing the things that he wanted or needed – clothes, books, things like that.

"Sweetie, if you need anything, don't be afraid to let us know, alright?" Shane just nodded. "Ok, well dinner's going to be in about an hour, Jason?"

"Oh, I'm just gonna help him unpack."

"Did he say that was ok?" Jason's mother asked. Shane nodded in response to the question. "Alright, well we'll call you when there's food."

"Thanks mom," Jason offered his mom a small smile before turning to Shane. "Ok, so what first?"


	2. Chapter 2

It didn't take long to get Shane unpacked. Everything in the suitcases had been folded and/or stacked perfectly, so it was really just a matter of moving it to the drawers. Everything that didn't go in the dresser went in the closet or on the bookshelf, save for the guitar, which stayed in it's case, propped up in the corner of the room, the laptop, which was set up on the desk and the box that Shane had carried with him, which still sat on the bed. The weirdest part about the unpacking process though, was that Shane was able to communicate to Jason _exactly_ where he wanted everything without saying a single word and without much gesticulation.

"What about that one?" Jason asked, pointing at the box on the bed. Shane said nothing, he simply moved over to the bed, grabbed the box and slid it carefully under the bed as though answering Jason's question. Jason was itching with curiosity as to what was in the box, but it was clear that he wasn't going to be told, so he did nothing to try and change that.

The whole time that they had been packing, Shane had tried to keep his face as hidden as possible – keeping his head down and his hair in the way as much as he could. Out of respect, Jason had not tried to catch Shane off guard, it was unprecedented and eventually he would look up, so why push it?

"So," Jason looked at the clock in the room and then at Shane. "It'll be dinner time soon, do you want a few minutes to just kind of settle in on your own?" Shane nodded. "Ok, come and get me if there's anything you want, I'll be in my room." Shane nodded again and Jason exited the bedroom, closing the door quietly. There wasn't much point in trying to do something in the few minutes he had before dinner, so he just sat on his bed, contemplating all of the ways that this was going to change things for him and his family.

"Shane, it's time for dinner." Jason heard the knock on the other boy's door and went out into the hallway. As Shane left his room, he pulled down the sleeves of his sweatshirt so that only his fingertips were showing – and even then, just barely; Jason even swore that he saw Shane shiver slightly as he followed Jason's mom down the stairs.

The dinner table was void of all conversation, practically silent save for the sounds of silverware doing its work, plates being filled and dishes being passed and moved. No one wanted to force Shane to talk, but they didn't want to have a conversation excluding him either, so silence was the chosen solution. Due to the lack of conversation, Jason subjected himself to watching the actions occurring around the table and almost immediately took note of how little food Shane had taken. He frowned slightly at the large amount of empty space on the boy's plate and made a point to pass the garlic bread to Shane instead of setting it in the center of the table for Shane to take himself as he would have done otherwise. Shane ate slowly and delicately, being careful to both spill nothing and eat every last crumb on his plate, looking down all the while. As a result of taking so little food, Shane was naturally the first to finish, and he sat there quietly, politely waiting for everyone else to finish. Once they were all done, Jason began to clear to the table. Usually he had to be asked, but tonight he didn't want to start an argument, it would do no good. About three seconds later, Shane surprised everyone by getting to his feet and helping Jason.

"Thank you boys," Jason's father said as the two teens silently rinsed the dishes and put them in the dish washer.

"You're welcome," Jason replied for both of them.

"Your mother and I are going for a walk, we should be back in about an hour or so, try not to burn the house down."

"It'll still be here when you get back," Jason assured with a slight smile before falling back into the rhythm of dishwashing. It was a simple method that the two boys had just fallen into in the past couple of minutes – Jason rinsed and Shane put things in the dishwasher. Jason was pretty sure that he knew what his parents were going to talk about on their walk – Shane, how things were going to be different, how to handle certain situations should they arise, things like that, and Jason sort of wished that they would clue him in a little more, but it wasn't the right time to bother them about it, so he didn't. "Did you get enough to eat?" Jason asked as he handed a plate to Shane. Shane just nodded and placed the dish in the dishwasher. The younger boy still kept his sleeves pulled way down, seemingly ignoring the fact that the cuffs were getting wet as he worked. While Jason scrubbed the pot that his mom had made the spaghetti sauce in, Shane put the leftovers into the refrigerator, despite Jason's assurance that he could finish on his own. Jason didn't know whether Shane was used to helping, or whether he thought it was his duty – then again there was a lot about Shane that Jason didn't know, in fact probably the only thing that he _did_ know was that Shane was an orphan and he had a guitar, so he probably knew how to play it. "Ok," Jason sighed, grabbing a paper towel and wiping his hands off. "That's the kitchen done." He handed a paper towel to Shane, who dried his own hands. "Thanks for helping." Shane, unsurprisingly, just shrugged. It was just as they were about to leave the kitchen that Shane instinctively raked his left hand through his hair, pushing it away from his face, causing two things to happen simultaneously: Shane looking down quickly, letting his hair fall back over his face, and Jason letting out an unstoppable gasp as he saw the long, thin cut that was beginning to scar on Shane's jaw.


	3. Chapter 3

Shane took Jason's gasp as a gasp of disgust and turned, quickly walking back up the stairs and into his new room. He shut the door quietly and sat down on the edge of his bed, pulling his sweatshirt around him as much as possible. He ran one of his fingers over the injury that Jason had just seen, shivering as he touched the wound. He hated that it would scar, that it would be there forever, serving as a constant reminder that he had been unable to protect his family. Guilt washed over him and he lay down on the bed, curling into a tiny ball, holding his knees tightly to his chest. He thought, for what must have been the hundredth time, about how easy it would be to just kill himself right now – how simple it would be to alleviate himself of any and all pain that he was feeling now or may feel in the future, but that would be wrong; he deserved this pain, it was his punishment for failing to guard his mother and his cross to bear.

Jason stood outside of Shane's door, unsure of what to do. He could knock on the door, attempt to offer comfort, but what if Shane wanted to be alone right now? After a couple of minutes of heavy deliberation, he settled for leaving Shane alone, at least for the time being. He went back to his room and took out his phone, dialing his friend Nate.

"Hey Jason, what's up?" Nate asked.

"Look, I have to cancel on you for tomorrow, something kind of huge came up."

"What is it?" Nate asked. "Is everything ok?"

"Kind of, here, let me explain." Jason took a deep breath, making sure to get in only the air he needed and no more. "A couple of my mom's friends, Mr. and Mrs. Gray were murdered, and-"

"Oh, the double murder from across the river?" Nate questioned, interrupting Jason.

"Yeah."

"Ouch, man, I didn't know that you knew them!" Nate sounded genuinely horrified.

"I didn't really, but uh, my parents did and well, they were kind of the god parent's for the Gray's son, Shane, and he kind of moved in with us this evening, so I'm gonna stay here tomorrow."

"Are you serious?" Nate asked, more than a little surprised.

"Yeah," Jason nodded, more out of habit than necessity.

"How old is he?"

"16? 17? He's our year in school, I don't know, I haven't really talked to him."

"Why not?"

"Oh," Jason sighed. "Well he doesn't really talk – at least he hasn't yet, not since I met him at least, he just nods and shrugs and shakes his head."

"Is he like, ok?"

"I dunno," Jason shrugged. "Probably not, I mean his parents died, but look, just don't talk to people about it, ok? I only told you because I really trust you, just let every body else figure out in their own sweet time."

"You know you can trust me, but Caitlyn's gonna be pissed if I don't tell her."

"Well take one for the team man, just because she looks hot in a swimsuit and finally agreed to go out with you doesn't mean that you have to tell her everything."

"Ok, I didn't have to convince her to go out with me it-"

"Just took three years of you pining after her?" Jason said skeptically.

"Point taken,' Nate sighed. "I won't tell her, don't worry. I've known you longer anyways."

"Thank you."

"So, about this boy…" Jason could tell that Nate was smiling, but he himself let out an annoyed sigh.

"Nat, it's not like that, ok? He just lost his parents and he's not my type."

"What, is he ugly?"

"He's quiet." Jason rolled his eyes. "He's quiet and he's broken. I don't mind having friends like that, but I like my crushes upbeat and energetic."

"Take Sander out," Nate joked. "He's upbeat."

"Could he be any less interested?"

"Could he be any straighter?" Nate countered.

"This is true," Jason chuckled. "You always make tough days better, Caitlyn's lucky to have you, she probably hasn't realized it, but she will."

"Are you lusting after me Jason Flynn?" Nate teased.

"Oh yes, god, Nate, baby I need you so bad, dump the really sexy chick and come over here now, come fuck your best friend!"

"Ok, that's taking a good joke a couple of steps too far." Nate sounded mildly disgusted and Jason couldn't blame him.

"Probably true," he agreed. "Sorry about that."

"Apology accepted, we'll miss you tomorrow, but drop me a call when you're free, and you bring the somber kid along if you want, no one will care if he's a buzzkill if his parents are dead."

"I'll keep that in mind," Jason nodded. "Thanks Nate."

"No problemo, hasta la vista Flynn." With that, Nate hung up, leaving Jason back to square one: go check on Shane or fuck around until it was time to go to bed. The easy thing to do would be to go to stay in his room and play video games until he got tired, but the right thing to do would be to go check on this new kid. With a sigh, Jason stood up. He opened his door and ran straight into his mother.

"Hey Jason," she smiled at him. "Look, your father and I have to get up early for work, so we're calling it a night, just – if he needs anything, take care of it please?"

"I will," Jason nodded.

"I'm sorry that we're asking so much of you all of a sudden but-"

"You gave me a choice, mom," Jason tilted his head to the side. "I picked this, go sleep."

"Thank you," she smiled, kissed her son on the forehead, and did as he told her. Jason sat in his room for a few minutes, waiting until the lights in his parents room went off, before crossing the hall. He knocked lightly on the door, and a few seconds later, Shane opened it.

"Hey," Jason smiled amiably. "I was gonna make some tea, do you uh, do you drink tea?" Shane nodded slowly. Jason wasn't much of a tea drinker himself, but he'd heard that it was calming, and that seemed like something this boy might need. "Do you want some?" Shane nodded again, this time slipping out of his room, following Jason towards the kitchen, just as silent as ever.


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N Sorry about lack of posting, I have been doing homework and group work for college. Anyways, I also haven't been sleeping, literally not in almost three days until last night, so I'm making posting a little more sporadic and less regular until I can figure out how to sleep again. I'm sorry! I'll still post when I can! And that means like, once or twice a week probably. - Havah

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Shane followed Jason towards the tea kettle, fully prepared to help, but Jason shook his head. "It really only takes one person to put water on to boil, I can do it." Shane nodded and went to go sit at the island in the middle of the kitchen, watching silently as Jason filled the kettle and set it on the stovetop to boil. "So," Jason sat down next to Shane while they waited. "You don't have to answer this if you don't want to, but I was wondering why you kinda ran away earlier." Shane shrugged. He knew the answer, but explaining it would involve, well, _explaining _it, and that was really quite low on Shane's list of things to do. "I'm not a judgmental person," Jason offered. "I don't really know how I expect you to use that information, I just think that it's important that you know you can be anything and anyone that you want around me, because I can guarantee that, when I'm not keeping myself in check like I am right now, I'm weirder." Jason thought that he almost saw Shane smile, but he wasn't sure. "You live here now, you'll see eventually." Shane shifted uncomfortably.

The silence lasted almost two minutes, two awkward, long minutes in which Jason began to question whether or not inviting Shane to have some tea was, in fact, a good idea or not. "So," he licked his lips, trying to avoid antsy fidgeting. "Can I ask you some questions?" Shane nodded. "I'll keep them yes or no, that way you don't have to talk," Jason assured, and Shane just shrugged. "Ok, so uh…" Now that Jason had the privilege to ask questions, his mind had been wiped blank, just like an etch-a-sketch that had been shaken clean. "Are you ok?" Jason asked the question before really thinking about it. His eyes widened and he immediately wanted to take it back. It was a stupid question to ask and he was afraid of the repercussions that it could have on whatever potential friendship the two boys might have sparked in the future. Shane looked up, catching Jason's eyes in his own for the first time, and shook his head, almost deliberately. Jason gulped. "Will you be ok?" Jason asked. Shane did nothing, and Jason found that it may be prudent to amend his question. "Over time, I mean not right away, but eventually in either the near future or distant?"

It was Shane's turn to lick his lips nervously. He turned away from Jason again, forcing his eyes to focus on the ant that was slowly making it's away across the green and black granite counter top, disappearing as it hit the spots of black. Shane slammed his fist down on it, crushing the tiny bug into the stone before nodding slowly. Without a word, Shane stood up. He grabbed a paper towel from the kitchen roll and let trace amounts of water drip on to it from the sink before using it to wipe up the discrete mess that he had caused with the bug. Jason watched in awe as Shane moved, gracefully almost, to dispose of the damn paper product before returning to his seat as though nothing had happened. "Tomorrow's grocery shopping day." Jason decided to change the subject. "During the summer, that's my job, so I'm going whenever I wake up, mom said for you to make a list of things you want or things that you need so that I can get them, or…" Jason trailed off for a second, hesitating before completing his thought. "You could come with me."

Again, Shane paused before answering, wondering how he was supposed to answer a two part question without speaking. He nodded his head, hoping that Jason would get confused and lead him into an easier answer. Luckily for him, Jason realized his slip-up and corrected it. "Was that a yes to making the list?" Shane shook his head no. "You want to come?" Jason queried. Shane nodded. "Ok, it'll be nice to have some company." Jason, quite unsure of what to ask next, let out a soft sigh, allowing them to slide back into silence, this one far more temperate. They were only pulled from their individual thoughts, or in Jason's case, individual zoning out, by the sharp whistling of the tea kettle. Jason got up immediately so that the shrieking would not awake his parents, and poured the steaming water carefully into two ceramic mugs that had been painted by one of his mother's friends. He then went to the cupboard and pulled out the family's selection of teas.

"Here," he handed the big box to Shane along with one of the mugs and a spoon. It was a jumbled mess of various kinds of tea, and Shane rifled through it for a few seconds before settling with an herbal mint fusion. "Do you want anything with it?" Jason asked, selecting a raspberry zinger for himself – he didn't care much for the flavor of any tea, and that one easily had the best color. Shane shook his head and Jason put the box of teas away, dumping a little bit of sugar into his own mug. "You can drink it in your room if you want," Jason stated. "You look kind of tired." Shane nodded, grateful to be allowed to go back to the room where he could be alone with his thoughts. It wasn't that he didn't like Jason, it was that he felt bad remaining so quiet around him; he just wasn't ready to talk yet. "Ok," Jason smiled and grabbed his own mug, leading the way back up the stairs after shutting off all of the lights.

Jason stopped just outside of Shane's door, and Shane pushed it open with the hand that wasn't carefully holding his steaming mug steady. "Wait," Jason spoke hurriedly, wanting to make sure that he got in this one last thing before Shane closed the door. Shane paused and looked at Jason, now less afraid to let his scarring cut sneak into view, seeing as Jason had already caught a glimpse of it. "Who are you, Shane Gray?" Jason asked, not really expecting an answer.

"I'm just a boy who's afraid of the dark." Shane slipped into his room, shutting the door quietly, leaving Jason utterly flabbergasted.


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N Ok, so due to college life schedule, I've decided to update ONCE a week...unless I get bored, which I doubt will happen. So yeah, if I don't update at least every 7 days, send me angry messages and remind me! I'm also sorry that replying to reviews is taking so long. IT WILL get done, I swear! **_

_**Love, Havah

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The next day, Shane was back to his previous silence. When Jason woke up, Shane was already sitting at the island, his fingers curled possessively around a cup of coffee, a half eaten bowl of soggy cornflakes in front of him. He was already showered and dressed, his seemingly token black sweatshirt wrapped around him. Jason, who was only wearing the ratty T-shirt and boxers that he had slept in, felt immediately out of place. He wondered, as he made a beeline for the poptarts, if Shane felt out of place too or if it was just him.

In the summer and on weekends, Jason wasn't a coffee drinker, so while his poptarts were toasting, instead of pouring his usual mug of coffee, he turned his attention to Shane. "Morning," Jason nodded his head at Shane, who nodded back, acting as though nothing had happened last night; as though he had said nothing before closing his door. "So after I eat I'm just gonna shower and change and then we can hit the store, that ok?" Shane nodded. Jason caught his breakfast midair as it leapt from the toaster. He carried the food back to his room, wolfing it down as he waited for the water in his shower to warm up. Once he was out, he dressed quickly, being careful to wear darker colors than usual so as not to blind Shane either physically or emotionally, grabbed his keys and headed back downstairs.

"You ready?" Jason asked, re-entering the kitchen. Shane nodded and stood up, setting his coffee cup in the sink before following Jason outside towards the yellow T-Bird that Jason and his mom had spent the better of last summer fixing up. Shane got into the passengers seat, silently admiring the car. He was pulled from his inner adoration as Jason turned the key in the ignition, prompting Reel Big Fish to blast through the speakers, startling Jason and terrifying Shane.

"Shit, sorry!" Jason immediately turned the music down, feeling more guilty every second as he watched Shane attempt to regulate his skittish breathing. "Shane, I'm really sorry…" Shane just nodded as though trying to communicate to Jason that it was ok. Jason began to drive, feeling awful about scaring the already tormented boy.

The ride to the store was silent, excluding the now quiet ska pulsing through the car. It was a short drive – five minutes including parallel parking, which was not Jason's forte, and soon they were walking through the doors. They went through the list in order, first grabbing the basics – fruit, vegetables, chicken, pasta, dairy products of various persuasions, etc, before moving on to the last two things on the list: **Snacks, anything Shane wants. **"Ok," Jason smiled, showing Shane the list. "We have all day, so we can just go down each aisle and you can snag whatever you feel like. Shane nodded, following after Jason, taking only a couple of things here and there.

"Well if it isn't Senor Flynn." Jason turned to find himself face to face with a fairly short boy who was wearing the red uniform required by all employees over his jeans and t-shirt.

"Luke! Hey!" Jason smiled.

"You're awfully colorless today," Luke noted. "I've got bright orange sales labels," he held up the sticker gun that he had been using to label boxes of Kellogg cereal. "Want one?"

"Fuck yeah!" Jason nodded, smiling as Luke pressed the gun to his chest, rolling a sticker reading **SALE ITEM** across his black shirt. "Thanks."

"No problem," Luke shrugged. "What about you? Want one?" he asked, turning to Shane and holding the sticker gun up again. Shane just shook his head; he wasn't really one to cover his body in brightly colored stickers. "Suit yourself, although I've never seen Jason with a boy wearing less than four colors." Luke winked at Shane. "I guess he makes exceptions time to time though, you must be quite the catch."

"No, Luke!" Jason's eyes widened and he spoke hurriedly. "It's not like that AT ALL, he's just a _friend._" Jason took care to stress the word 'friend,' hoping that Luke would get the point so that he wouldn't have to go into the whole song and dance about Shane's parents and the new member of their household.

"Introduce," Luke demanded.

"Luke Wagner, Shane Gray; Shane, Luke." Jason made the introductions hastily, gesturing awkwardly between the two boys as he wondered what Shane would think of him now.

"Pleasure to meet you, Shane Gray." Luke held his hand out to Shane, who shook it loosely, not making eye contact with Luke. "Ah, I get it," Luke nodded knowingly. "He's not your type, too quiet." It was Jason's turn to nod awkwardly as he tried pointlessly to send telepathic messages to Luke telling him to SHUT UP! It was, in fact, Luke that was Jason's type – a year older, Luke was college bound in the fall and the loud, colorful, good looking, popular boy had been Jason's clichéd school boy crush since they had been introduced in Jason's freshman year.

"Well it was nice to see you, but we should go." Jason looked at Shane, then at Luke. "It was nice to see you."

"Wait, man, I'm having a party next week, I think Wednesday, you should come, bring Shane."

"I'll think about it," Jason flashed Luke one last smile before he walked away, Shane following behind him. "I'm sorry about that," Jason bit his bottom lip. "I should have warned you about Luke, he's very eccentric, kind of a shocker if you're not ready for him really, but then again-" Jason began to ramble, and part way through, Shane did something that Jason never would have expected; he interrupted him.

"You're gay?" Shane asked quietly, so quietly in fact that Jason was unable to detect his tone of voice, which frustrated him greatly.

"Yeah…" Jason gulped, wondering how Shane would take that news.

"Ok." Shane nodded, but it wasn't an awkward nod, it was more of a 'that's fine with me' nod, and Jason let out a tiny breath that he had been holding back.


	6. Chapter 6

Again, Shane slipped into his silence, and Jason spent the better part of the next two days mulling over the few words he had said, his brain taking him again and again to Shane's words just before he slipped back into his bedroom. _I'm just a boy who's afraid of the dark._ Jason sighed. He didn't understand if those words were supposed to state only the literal meaning, or was Shane trying to convey a more abstract feeling? The question plagued Jason even as he straightened his tie on Saturday morning, sighing as he took in the all-black suit. His parents had given him the option of staying home, as he hadn't known Shane's parents, but he felt like it would be callous of him to stay at home, and he had opted to attend the funeral. When he had initially told his mother of his decision, she had praised him for being such a grownup, but Jason didn't feel that way at all, he felt like it was his duty as a part of this family to be there, and that's why he was going.

"Shane?" he heard his mother knocking at Shane's door. "Sweetie, it's time to go, are you ready?" Jason opened his door, exiting his own room just in time to see Shane enter the hallway. The boy was looking down, his sorrow practically reflected in the shiny black shoes he was staring at. "Come on, we don't want to be late." Jason's mother put her arm around Shane and walked down the stairs, Jason behind them. He knew that he probably should have been a little angry at his mother for completely ignoring him, but Shane needed her more right now, and some otherworld maturity in Jason knew that.

"I'm gonna take Gloria," he announced to his parents, gesturing towards his car. He hadn't named her intentionally, when he had purchased her, the vanity plate read Gloria, and the name had just come up on its own. His parents nodded, and he pulled the keys from his pocket. "Shane, if you want to come with me, there's always room for you in the car." As soon as he had invited Shane, he realized that it was probably a mistake, because now Shane looked torn between the woman with her arm around him and the boy offering him a ride. _He's on his way to his parents' funeral, he doesn't need any more confusion, why are you such an idiot?_

"You should go with Jason," his mother offered. "That way everyone can sit in a front seat." Shane let out a silent sigh of relief as she removed her arm from around his shoulders, making his decision for him. Shane crossed over to Jason, nodding a quick thank you before getting into the passenger seat. Jason drove, following his parents' car even though he knew where the cemetery was. The ride started off silent, Jason didn't turn on the music, he didn't know if it was the right mood, but about a minute into the drive, Shane's slender finger reached forward, pressing the tiny button that spurred the music, now Angels and Airwaves, to play. Jason smiled a little, though he kept his eyes on the road as Shane sank back into the seat. The two boys let the music wash over them. It was loud, it was a little angry, and it was exactly what they both needed to calm down. Shane relaxed in the passenger's seat, almost to the point of getting the sleep that he had abandoned the night before.

"Do you want me to stand with you?" Jason asked, not sure of what else he should say. He wanted to say something to Shane, but he didn't know what Shane wanted to hear. Shane just nodded. "If there's anything you need, and I mean anything, not just the usual shoulder to cry on or potato casserole, I mean anything, I'm here for you." Shane nodded, leaning back into the seat again, this time thinking through the rest of the song before reaching over and turning the music down, but not off so that just a faint whisper of Tom Delonge could be heard over the sound of the car mechanics at work.

"Anything?" Shane asked, turning in his seat to look at Jason.

"Yeah," Jason nodded, a little surprised that Shane had spoken. "Absolutely."

"Turn the car around."

"What?" Jason looked at Shane, surprised.

"Turn the car around," Shane bit his lip, his voice soft and his tone nervous. Though he was clearly uneasy, he didn't take his eyes off of Jason, who was in turn, keeping his eyes on the road, though his fingers had gripped the steering wheel a little tighter at Shane's request, his knuckles beginning to grow white with confusion. "I don't want to go to a service where people are going to fawn all over me and tell me how grown up I am and tell me how sorry they are and ask if I'm alright. I'm not alright, and they know that deep down, but they ask and I say I'm fine because if I don't they'll just worry, and I really, _really _don't want to deal with that. There are better ways of honoring my parents and better places in which to do it; if there really is any kind of spirit or soul, they'll sense that I'm sending them off from wherever it is we are – we won't need the priest or the flowers or the coffin, just memories, and I have plenty of those, but none of those memories are from that cemetery." Jason continued to drive forward, though he slowed the pace down, unsure of what to do. "Jason, I know that it's a lot to ask, but I don't care what people say and I'll take whatever blame, I just can't help but think that they won't feel _me _if there are a hundred other people there, just standing and crying in a location that has no significance to my family. I understand if you can't do this, all I'm asking is that you think about it." Jason nodded, waited for his parents to turn at the next corner, then pulled a sharp u-turn, increasing his speed as he turned a different corner so that his parents wouldn't notice they were gone until they were already out of sight.


	7. Chapter 7

"Alright, where are we going?" Jason asked, looking at Shane.

"Um," Shane bit his lower lip, trying to think of the best place to honor his parents. "Could you uh...could you please take me across the river? You know, to where I used to live?"

"Sure," Jason nodded. "Address?"

"5521 SE Jefferson."

"Ok." Jason began to drive towards the address that Shane had given him, and as he turned onto the bridge, his phone began to ring. "Hello?"

"Jason, sweetie, did you take a wrong turn?" His mother's voice filled the other end of the phone.

"No," Jason sighed. "Mom, we're not coming, Shane begged me to turn the car around, he wants to do something else for his parents and in all honesty, nothing that anyone can do is going to make him change his mind."  
"What are we supposed to do?" His mother asked, her voice sounding both nervous and terrified.

"Just tell them that…uh…" Jason struggled for a good lie, or at least a halfway decent excuse.

"Tell them that I locked myself in the bathroom," Shane offered.

"Tell them that he locked himself in the bathroom and refused to come out, not matter how hard we tried, so I stayed with him to make sure that nothing bad happened to him."

"That's not good, but it'll do, and Jason, when I get home you and I are going to have a chat about this, you can't just drive off, this is his parents _funeral_!"

"I know, but mom, but no talk, please? I think he knows how to celebrate their lives better than anyone else, so I'm going to go with that." Jason hung up the phone, knowing that his mom would be fine with this as long as he was able to convince her that it was the right thing to do.

"Is she mad?" Shane asked nervously.

"No," Jason shook his head. "Just confused, don't worry about it, just relax, I'll handle her."

"Why are you so nice to me?"

"Why shouldn't I be?" Jason asked. Shane shrugged, thinking before speaking.

"Because, I mean, I'm coming into your house and fucking things up."

"No you're not," Jason said automatically, shaking his head. "Mom and dad asked me before they took you in, I wanted you to come, and you haven't fucked anything up, you've just made things different, and different isn't always bad."

"Thanks…" Shane sighed.

"I think a better question is why you're talking all of a sudden."

"I dunno," Shane shrugged. "I guess you just make me feel safe." Shane once again leaned back in the seat and Jason let him have silence, smiling slightly at Shane's words; it felt good to know that he made this boy feel safer. The drive to Shane's house took them about 15 minutes, and when they got there, Jason saw that it was still taped off as a crime scene. He also noticed, however, that that didn't seem to stop Shane. The boy got out of the car and walked onto the lawn, stopping just before the yellow tape. Jason was about to get out as well when he noticed Shane fall to his knees and begin to talk. Jason couldn't hear what Shane was saying, but he decided to give Shane a little bit of time alone before approaching him.

"Mom? Dad?" Shane sighed. "I don't know if you can hear me, but I'm so, so sorry…I should have been able to protect you, I know that and I should have tried harder, but I failed. I hope that you can find someway to forgive me, I really do…and I just wanted you to let tell you, you know, in case you aren't mad at me for letting you die, that I'm in a good place, the family that you chose for me is wonderful, so if you were worrying about me, you don't have to." Shane felt a lump rise in his throat, and was instantly caught off guard. He hadn't been able to cry since his parents had died, not a single tear, not even the lump, but now, well now the lump was there. "I love you, both of you and I'm so glad that you were my parents, even for so short a time. I'm also really sorry that I didn't go to your funeral, I just felt better telling you everything here where you both lived and than in some cemetery where no one else knew you guys like I did. I really hope that you can find a way to forgive me, though even if you do, forgiving myself is a whole different story…and now I'm just rambling, so mom, dad, I love you, ok? I hope you hear that." It wasn't until Shane stopped talking and started just staring at the clouds that Jason got out of the car. He didn't say anything as he approached Shane, who continued looking at the sky and not at the boy approaching him. "Goodbye, I hope that you can feel that, because I really am trying to let you guys go and not move on, but just get to the point where I'm ok, is that ok? I am allowed to be ok?"

"Yes," Jason whispered, sinking slowly to his knees beside Shane. "You are allowed to be ok, Shane, because even though your parents are gone, they still love you, they always will, death doesn't stop love, and they want you to be happy. If they're half the parents they should be and a quarter of the parents that mine are, you're happiness is all that they've ever wanted and that is never going to stop."

"Do you think there's a heaven?" Shane asked, looking over at Jason.

"No," Jason shook his head. "But I believe that there is something, some afterlife that's better even than here, and I _know_ that your parents are there right now, watching over you and thinking about how lucky they _are_ to have a son who loves them so much." Shane didn't even try to keep it in any longer, he collapsed into Jason's arms, and all of the tears that he hadn't been able to shed since the murder came pouring forth in a rampant cascade of pain, love and a strange, unexplainable sense of closure.


	8. Chapter 8

By the time Jason and Shane got home, Jason's parents were back, waiting for them in the living room. They could tell from Shane's red eyes and tear stained cheeks that he had been crying, and not just a little bit; they could even tell that their own son had shed a few tears for Shane's loss as he pulled off his now grass stained blazer and threw it over the back of a chair in the living room. "I'm gonna go make tea," Jason announced. "Anybody else want some?" Both his parents and Shane nodded that they did, and Jason headed to the kitchen to boil the water while Shane sat down on the empty couch.

"Look," he said softly. "It wasn't Jason's idea to ditch the funeral, I begged him, so please, don't punish him for it, punish me." He looked away. "I know that you're doing so much for me, and I really do appreciate it, I shouldn't have acted out like that, but I just couldn't go, I'm sorry."

"Shane," Jason's father cleared his throat. "It's fine, you won't be punished and neither will Jason; he knows what he did and if he really believes that it was the right thing than it probably was, despite a few indiscretions here and there, Jason's morals are set fairly straight."

"I can tell," Shane nodded. "I couldn't have been taken in by better people and I mean that. I know that I haven't said much since I got here, but I'm working on that, and I just wanted to thank you for giving me another chance at having a family."

"We don't mind," Jason's mother shook her head. "It's a change to have you here, but we're all adapting, and you're a good kid Shane, we just we wish that we could help you more."

"You are helping me," Shane raised his head slightly.

"Look, Shane, at the funeral," Jason's father began to speak. "One of your friends, Mitchie, asked if she could come and visit you some time and we told her that it was alright with us, we told her to give it a day or too though, and if it's not alright with you, we can call her and tell her that, but she really seemed like he wanted to make sure that you were ok."

"It's fine," Shane nodded. "I need to talk to her anyways."

"Good," Jason's father nodded. "She seemed like a nice girl."

"She is. You know, Jason is too – a good guy, I mean."

"We know," Jason's mother smiled. "I'm glad to see that he's being so nice to you."

"He's being great, very kind, very patient."

"You say that now," his mother chuckled. "Just wait until he loosens up a little."

"What do you mean?" Shane asked. "Is he ok?"

"Oh, yeah," Jason's mother nodded. "He's just a very vibrant guy and he didn't want to hit you with all of the Jason Flynn intensity at once, not after what happened, he wanted to ease you into it."

"That's really nice of him," Shane sighed, leaning back into the couch, thinking about how much he wanted to see what Jason was normally like.

"Ok, we have Earl Grey for mom," Jason entered the living room with a tray of steaming mugs a few minutes later. He handed his mom the first mug. "Orange spice for dad," he handed his dad the **World's Greatest Dad** mug. "And mint for you, right?" he handed Shane the second to last mug and sat on the couch next to him.

"Your memory is too good, Jason," his father smiled.

"I know," Jason returned the smile as he settled into the couch with his raspberry zinger, something he had to admit he might actually be growing partial too.

"So," his mother said after a few minutes. "I don't feel like cooking tonight, and I doubt your father does either, so what do you boys want to order in?"

"I'm flexible," Jason's father shrugged.

"Let Shane choose," Jason jerked his head nonchalantly. "I'm open to whatever."

"Oh, that's ok, you can pick," Shane shook his head.

"No," Jason smiled slightly. "This is your turn, what do you want to eat?"

"I dunno, what are the options?" Shane asked, sighing a little.

"Pizza, Chinese, Fast Food, really whatever you want," Jason's mom shrugged.

"Oh god, I dunno, what do you guys want?" Shane asked.

"He wants Chinese food," Jason declared.

"What?" his mom looked at him, confused.

"He perked up when you mentioned Chinese food, at least I think he did…you did, didn't you?" he looked at Shane, who nodded, not wanting Jason to look stupid for an observation that was, in fact, correct.

"Alright, Chinese it is." Jason's father stood up. "I'm gonna go change out of this suit, we can order in about an hour or so, think about what you want." He walked off, followed shortly by Jason's mother, leaving the two boys alone.

"If I go take a shower, will you be ok alone?" Jason asked, getting to his feet. "I won't be long."

"Jason," Shane stood up, facing the taller boy. "I'm hurt, I'm not dying."

"Sorry," Jason mumbled, looking down.

"It's ok, go shower, I think I will too."

"Ok," Jason started walking towards the stairs, glad that Shane had a shower in his room, it made things easier. "Well I'll just be in my room, so if you want to just come on over when you're done, I shower fast."

"Ok," Shane nodded and watched Jason walk to his room part way before stopping. "Hey, Jason?"

"Yeah?" Jason turned around.

"Just…thanks for everything today, I really needed someone to be there for me in the right way, and you did everything that I needed and more, so thank you."

"Hey, don't mention it, you needed somebody, I had the car, any other halfway decent person would have done the exact same thing."

"No," Shane shook his head. "It wasn't just what you did, it wasn't just that you did what I asked of you, it's what you said to me, about heaven and all, and…and the way that you just held me in the middle of the lawn for almost an hour while I cried all over you, so yeah, thanks." Shane turned to enter his room, but this time Jason stopped him.

"Hey, Shane?"

"Yeah?" Shane turned around.

"If you ever need someone to cry all over again, I'm just across the hall."


	9. Chapter 9

"Do you want to watch a movie?" Jason asked Shane after dinner. "My parents are watching the news, but that's just depressing."

"Ok," Shane nodded.

"I have a few in my room, we can watch something in there."

"Ok," Shane said again, following Jason back towards his room.

"What kind of movie do you want?" Jason asked as he opened a drawer in his desk to reveal a mess of unorganized DVDs and video games.

"I picked dinner," Shane shook his head. "You're picking the movie."

"Fine," Jason rolled his eyes before closing them and reaching into the drawer, blindly grabbing a DVD. "Batman Begins?" he asked.

"Sure," Shane shrugged. "I've never seen it."

"Wait, you've never seen Batman?!"

"I have," Shane countered. "Just not that one."

"But this is the _best _one!" Jason was awestruck at Shane's cinematic naiveté. "I thought that everybody had seen this one."

"Not me," Shane shrugged again. "I was sick when my friends went to go see it and I just never really got it together to rent it when it came out."

"Ok, well go get comfortable, I'll put it in." Shane nodded and sat on Jason's bed, leaning against a couple of pillows that he had propped against the head board. After Jason put the DVD in, he grabbed the remote control and joined Shane on the bed, propping up a couple of pillows of his own. It wasn't until Young Bruce Wayne sat in the play house with his parents, scared of the bats on stage that Jason realized his mistake. "Shit…" he muttered under his breath. "You know what? Let's watch something else." He grabbed for the remote, pausing the movie.

"Why?" Shane looked at Jason, one eyebrow raised in confusion.

"I forgot that the disk is scratched, it's gonna start to skip soon, I meant to get it cleaned, but I haven't done it yet," Jason said hurriedly, licking his lips.

"Well let's watch it until it starts to skip, it's good so far, I kind of want to see what happens."

"Look, it's just really not a good idea for us to watch this movie right now, maybe another time." Jason's firm, serious tone explained to Shane what his words could not, and the younger boy slowly realized what Jason meant.

"What happens?" Shane asked hesitantly. "In the movie, I mean, what is it that you don't want me to watch?"

"Shane-"

"Just tell me?" Shane asked, tilting his head to the side slightly. "I won't watch it, just tell me what it is."

"His parents get killed in front of him," Jason said softly.

"Oh," Shane nodded. "We should probably not watch that," he agreed.

"Yeah, look, Shane I'm sorry, I honestly didn't think about it, I feel awful, really…"

"Don't," Shane shook his head. "That's not the kind of thing that you should be worrying about, it's just a movie, you can't remember every little thing that happens and really I will be able to stomach it, just not today, it's enough that you remembered before we got there."

"No, Shane, really," Jason sighed. "I feel terrible."

"Don't," Shane said again, reaching up and putting his hand on Jason's shoulder. "Really, don't, it's fine, I promise."

"Ok," Jason nodded slowly, eyeing the hand on his shoulder. He couldn't help but notice the black fabric that covered not only all of Shane's arm, but half of his hand. "You know," he said slowly. "It's hot in here, how can you stand to be wearing that sweatshirt?"

"I…" Shane gulped, retracting his hand from Jason's shoulder quickly. "I need it."

"Are you cold? Cause I have blankets in the closet."

"No," Shane shook his head. "It's not that."

"Then what?" Jason asked gently. He didn't want to push Shane, he just wanted to help. "It's getting hard to ignore, if you're cutting-"

"That's not it," Shane shook his head, cutting Jason off mid sentence. "It's a little different…"

"Oh, do you uh, do you want to talk about it?"

"I dunno," Shane shrugged.

"Can you show me?" Shane did nothing for a moment, then nodded hesitantly. He slowly began to unzip the black hoodie, separating it across his chest to reveal a blue shirt, and as he pulled hit from his body, small bruises covering his arms. They were just starting to turn a greenish yellow, a sign that they were entering the third stage of their evolution. Jason kept his gasp back this time, knowing the trouble that it had caused last time, instead, he just stared in awe at the bruises. It was clear from the way they were morphing that Shane had received all of the bruises at the same time, and it pained Jason that he had to bear the wounds on top of the emotional pain. "Before you ask, they're from the people who killed my parents," Shane whispered, getting it over with as he squeezed his own eyes shut. "I can't bear to see them and I can't stand the idea of others seeing them."

"Why me?" Jason whispered.

"Because," Shane shrugged. "It's just like I said earlier, you make me feel safe. I'm not sure what it is about you, but there's something in your voice, in your actions even, that makes me trust you with this."

"You know what?" Jason smiled a little bit. "If you're hot in the sweatshirt I have something that you might be able to use to cover them."

"Really?" Shane asked, biting his lower lip.

"If you're not afraid to look a little ridiculous inside of the house, that is," Jason said, standing and rifling around in his sock drawer until he found what he was looking for. It was a part of his Halloween costume from when he had been in a "biker" gang with Nate and a few of their other friends. He nonchalantly chucked the mesh "sleeves" to Shane, who picked them up, examining them curiously.

"What _are_ these?" Shane asked, finally.

"Um," Jason let out a snort of laughter as Shane pulled one onto his arm. "They're sleeves that you wear to make it look like you have tattoos all over your arms."

"Well it's better than the bruises," Shane smiled, pulling on the other sleeve. "Thanks Jason."

"You're welcome," Jason shrugged. "And now for a movie you can't get depressed watching." He held up a DVD case, and Shane rolled his eyes.

"Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island?" Shane chuckled.

"Yes," Jason nodded. "Is that ok?"

"It's fine," Shane nodded, enjoying the way the mesh of the sleeves let his skin breathe and still covered up the discolored marring. Jason popped the DVD in, but before he headed back to the bed, he went to the closet and extracted what looked to Shane like giant mass of fluff.

"Ok, its lame, I know, but this is Arnold," Jason held up a gigantic, floppy, stuffed monkey, worn with love and age. "When I'm having a rough time, I uh, well I snuggle with him, and I know that's really stupid and it would be great if you didn't tell anyone that, even Luke – especially Luke, actually, but uh, if you want to cuddle with him for a few nights, I think he'd like that, I haven't been upset in awhile, so he hasn't gotten a lot of love."

"Are you sure?" Shane asked, hesitantly reaching for the proffered monkey.

"Yeah," Jason nodded. "His stomach's a really good pillow too, just so you know."

"Thanks." Shane tossed aside the pillow he had been leaning on, and situated himself with Arnold, Jason settling in next to him as the cartoon film began.

* * *

_**A/N I got a twitter, hit me up if you're interested! Username is EmilyAnn24601.**_


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N Sorry that I didn't update last week, I had finals, packing and flying home. I got in last night and I'm still exhausted!**_

_**-Havah

* * *

**_

"Shane," Jason gently shook the younger boy, who had fallen asleep during the movie. "Movie's over, come on, wake up."

"Nnnngh, what?" Shane asked, his eyes still closed as he shifted against Arnold. Jason was about to tell him to wake up and go back to his room, but Shane had been sleeping so peacefully and all of a sudden it felt wrong to make him move.

"Nothing, never mind, go back to sleep." Shane nodded, rolling over and curling up into a small lump on the bed while Jason hoisted himself off of the bed. He quickly changed into his pajamas, grabbed a pillow and a blanket, and exited the room, turning the lights off on his way out. He carried the blanket and pillow to the living room, where he fell down on the couch, over come with exhaustion from the emotionally draining day.

***

"Jason?" He awoke the next morning to his mother's confused voice. "Why are you on the couch?"

"Huh?" Jason asked, opening his eyes slowly, taking a moment to figure out for himself why he was in the living room and not his bed. "Oh, Shane fell asleep in my room watching Scooby-Doo last night, I felt like he should have his space and I didn't want to go into his room without permission, so I came down here."

"That was considerate of you," she smiled and sat down on the edge of the couch, beside her son. "I know that I've said this, but I mean it, you're showing incredible maturity and responsibility with this whole situation and I am really very proud of you."

"Thanks," Jason smiled. "You're doing pretty well with it too, I mean you're taking on another kid."

"It's easier for me than it is for you, I think, I go to work, you're with him all of the time, taking care of him."

"I don't mind," Jason smiled, speaking honestly. "I like him, he's cool."

"That's good, but Jason, if there's anything that you want, I think you're proved yourself worthy of at least a small reward, a new video game or something?"

"Well," Jason smiled slightly. "There is kind of one thing, but uh, Luke's having a party Wednesday, and his parents aren't going to be there, and I know that you're not big on un-chaperoned parties, but he invited Shane too and I promise that I'll be responsible…"

"Luke, he's that older boy with the dyed hair that you have a crush on?" His mother raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"Mom, please," Jason shook his head, rolling his eyes. "That crush was _so _last year."

"Well, I have to talk to your father, but I don't see why not as long as you promise not to drink anything with alcohol."

"Promise," Jason nodded, stretching out as he yawned. "No drugs and no sex either."

"Go wake Shane up," his mother rolled his eyes at his comment, changing the subject. "It's late, we all slept in."

"Ok." Jason stood, taking the blanket and pillow and heading back upstairs. Shane was still asleep, curled into a tiny ball on top of the covers, his tattoo-sleeved arms hugging Arnold like his life depended on it. Jason gulped. He didn't know if he would be able to wake Shane up, just like last night, but he had been sleeping for hours, so it had to be worth a try. He walked over to the bed and shook Shane gently. "Shane," he whispered. "Time to wake up for real this time."

"Huh?" Shane opened one eye sleepily and raised his left hand, pushing a few wayward strands of hair from his face.

"You've been sleeping for almost 12 hours," Jason pointed to the digital clock on the bedside table. "You fell asleep early, you used a lot of energy yesterday."

"Oh," Shane slowly pulled himself into a sitting position. "Why didn't I hear you wake up?" Shane asked, frowning slightly.

"I slept in the living room," Jason shrugged.

"What?" Shane's eyes widened. "Why did you do that?"

"You fell asleep in here and I didn't want to wake you up or violate your space."

"Ok, you have to stop," Shane shook his head.

"Stop what?"

"Being so nice to me, I don't deserve to be treated the way you treat me, I let my parents die and I don't deserve to have someone be as nice to me as you are."

"Shane!" Jason looked down at the younger boy, utter horror prevalent in both his expression and voice. "Do NOT say that! You didn't let your parents die, it was out of your hands! You did the best that you could and you have the bruises and scar to show for it! If anything, Shane, you're a fucking hero, at least you are to me. I wouldn't have been able to even try and defend my family, I would have been paralyzed in fear, but you did the best that you could and that is so fucking admirable. If I were _half_ the human being you are-" Shane cut Jason off by standing and pulling him into a bone crushing hug. Jason was caught off guard as the boy's thin arms circled tightly around him, but after a few seconds, he returned the gesture, patting Shane's back gently.

"I'm scared," Shane whispered in Jason's ear.

"What? Why?"

"Everything's changed for me, absolutely everything. My parents died, I have to switch schools, every time I hear something that I can't place immediately, I get scared that something's coming, every time there's a creak in the steps or the hallway I panic because I think someone's in the house…Jason, last night was the first time I'd slept more than an hour straight through since I got here."

"Wh-what?" Jason asked, pulling Shane down so that they were sitting on the bed.

"I'm sorry, I-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, no apologizing!" Jason shook his head. "Come here." He put his arm around Shane and the other boy automatically tipped his head so that it rested on Jason's shoulder. "Shane, nothing's gonna get you, ok? You're safe here, and if you sleep better in my room than in yours, then find comfort in knowing that I sleep great on the couch."

"What?" Shane asked, confused.

"If you want to sleep in my room again, I like the couch."

"Oh, well I won't do that to you again, but thanks for the thought." Shane smiled at Jason slightly, and Jason tightened the arm that he had around Shane, causing the other boy to scoot a little closer and forcing Jason's stomach to turn as he tried to deny that maybe, just a little bit, his type was beginning to change.


	11. Chapter 11

Jason was ready for the doorbell to ring, but that didn't stop him from jumping when it did. It was Wednesday afternoon, Luke's party was in a couple of hours, Jason's parents were still at work, and Shane was expecting his friend Mitchie at any moment. Shane and Jason were sitting in the living room when the doorbell went off, and Jason nearly jumped out of his skin. He was angry with himself, because he had been on edge ever since Shane had slept in his room. Shane got up to open the door, shaking his head amiably at Jason as he did so. "SHANE!" Mitchie smiled as she entered, wearing a messenger bag on her side and carrying a cardboard box in her hands. She set it down on the ground and pulled Shane into a massive hug, which Shane reciprocated.

"It's good to see you," Shane muttered as they pulled apart from the hug. "Come sit down."

"Ok." Mitchie smiled brightly and carried the box towards the living room. Shane and Mitchie sat on the couch opposite the chair where Jason was sitting, waiting patiently to be introduced to the energetic girl.

"Jason, this is Mitchie, Mitchie, this is Jason, he's been taking care of me." Jason couldn't help but smile as Shane said that.

"It's good to meet you," Jason said, standing and offering a hand to Mitchie, who shook it exuberantly.

"Likewise! Thanks for taking care of ShaneyBoy here, we've all been worried about him."

"I don't mind," Jason shrugged. "I mean he's low maintenance."

"Shane? Low maintenance?" Mitchie let out a scoff. "Yeah right!"

"I'm serious, he's been no trouble at all," Jason looked at Mitchie, confused.

"What's in the box?" Shane asked, breaking off the conversation before it turned too much against him.

"Just the classic Shane Gray care package!" Mitchie sat back down, handing the heavy box to Shane, who set it on his lap and began to go through it. It contained about three bags of Sour Patch Kids, a box of mint tea, Triscuit crackers, four family sized boxes of Kraft Mac N' Cheese, a bag of marshmallows, several different varieties of chocolate, a Smashing Pumpkins CD and a stress ball.

"Damn, you know me well," Shane smiled as he set the box down on the coffee table. "All of my favorite shit in one box."

"I hope I know what you like, we've been friends long enough," Mitchie chuckled.

"Thanks," Shane smiled appreciatively.

"I had it in the back of the truck at the funeral, but you uh, didn't exactly make it."

"I know, I'm sorry about that," Shane sighed, running his long fingers through his thick, dark hair. "It was just too much."

"I understand," Mitchie shrugged. "It was a beautiful service, but I'll bet whatever you did was more significant."

"It was," Shane nodded, looking over at Jason and sharing a small smile.

"Oh, mom and dad told me to send their love, they also said to invite you over anytime you want, so if you feel like a Torres meal, I guess all you have to do really is show up, my parents love you, no idea why," Mitchie joked, "but they do."

"Thanks," Shane nodded. "I might do that sometime. Tell your parents thank you for everything."

"Will do," Mitchie smiled. "They would have come, but they had to work."

"Makes sense," Shane shrugged it off.

"So Jason," Mitchie turned to Jason. "If you're gonna be watching after my Shane, you need to know a couple of things that he will probably not tell you."

"Ok," Jason nodded.

"First off, he hates, and I mean _hates_ jazz music. Second, he loves Sour Patch Kids, they make him better, it's incredible. Third, his guilty pleasure is Moulin Rouge, let me tell you, he _will _sing along, but lucky for us, he has a good voice, which was number four. Five, Chinese food is his comfort food. Six, he loves to snuggle, so if it doesn't put you off, give him lots of cuddles-"

"Ok, Mitchie, that's enough," Shane cut her off, his ears growing red.

"No, there's four more things!" Mitchie shook her head.

"You're done," Shane insisted.

"You suck," Mitchie rolled her eyes, sinking back into the couch. "You get embarrassed too easily, you shouldn't be afraid to show your inner Shane! He can show you his inner Shane, right Jason?"

"Of course," Jason nodded. "Shane, I keep Scooby-Doo DVDs in my room, I have a giant stuffed monkey that I hug when I get upset, I love bright colors, I love being a weirdo, I too sing along to movies – but not just Moulin Rouge, I'll sing along to anything and I stick out like a sore thumb in a crowd because of my energy level. You don't have to hide anything from me, Shane Gray."

"Thanks," Shane smiled.

"Look, I have to run, I really just came to drop the care package off, but before I go, there's one more thing."

"Yeah?" Shane asked, a little sad to see his friend leaving so quickly.

"Yeah," Mitchie nodded and reached into the messenger bag she had set on the ground. She pulled out a notebook, hardbound with an ornate design on the front and handed it to Shane.

"Oh wow," Shane breathed, running his fingers over the raised design. "Thank you, it's beautiful."

"It's uh…not from me," Mitchie bit her bottom lip.

"Who then?"

"Open it up after I leave, ok?" Jason could tell that Mitchie was nervous as she stood. "It was good to see you Shane."

"You too," Shane nodded, giving Mitchie a warm hug good bye before curiously looking back at the notebook. Once the door was shut and Mitchie gone, Shane opened up the notebook. Jason watched as he read it, Shane's eyes quickly scanning the first page, then without warning, he shut it, it threw the notebook to the ground and ran for the stairs. Jason picked up the notebook, planning to put it in the box and take it up to Shane, but curiosity, as laced with guilt as it was, overcame him, and he opened the book to the first page.

**Dear Shane,**

**Here, write your lyrics, make your music, don't let this get you down. You're a wonderful person and I know that you can get through this. I'm sorry for everything – I'm sorry for your parents and I'm sorry for what I did to you, but most of all, I'm sorry for breaking your heart. I love you. Andy.**


	12. Chapter 12

"Shane?" Jason set the box down and knocked on Shane's door. "Can I come in?" A second later the door opened, but Shane said nothing as he went back to sit on his bed. "I brought you your care package." Jason put the box on the floor and sat down on the bed next to Shane. "You ok?" Shane just shrugged. "Shane, please don't revert back to that, I like it when you talk." Jason sighed. "I could lie to you right now and tell you that I didn't read the notebook, but I did and I think that maybe it would help to vent?"

"I LOVED HIM!" Shane yelled, jumping to his feet and making Jason jump. "I fucking LOVED him and he said that he loved me too! He was my first – my first _everything _and then one day he just up and broke it off; told me that he just didn't love me and he wasn't sure that he ever had! He didn't even explain himself, he never so much as fucking apologized and now, six months later, he's finally saying that he's sorry and it's only because my parents died! That fucker knows how to get into my head and under my skin and now he's just pulling on the hold that he already has on me! FUCK!" Shane found himself standing in the middle of the room, face flush, arms flailing wildly, breath rapid to try and regulate the circulation of air through his body.

"I'm sorry," Jason stood, walking towards Shane. "He shouldn't use your vulnerability as a way to worm back in to your life." Jason pulled Shane into a hug. "You know what? Since my parents are out tonight, why don't we order in Chinese, rent Moulin Rouge, snuggle up in my room and wallow in self pity with Arnold and Sour Patch Kids."

"I don't want to impose on your life," Shane shook his head. "You've got that party that you're so excited about tonight, I don't want you to miss that, we can go."

"Do you want to go?" Jason asked, looking seriously at Shane.

"Yeah, sure." Shane nodded, hoping that Jason would buy the lie, because he felt bad for Jason's constant striving to cheer him up. Jason wanted to go to this party and it was time that Shane do something nice for him.

"Yeah, that's bullshit," Jason shook his head. "If you don't want to go Shane, just say so, and we can stay here."

"I do want to go," Shane insisted. "Well I did, but now this and I'm not really in the mood, but Jason, I want you to go, ok?"

"No," Jason shook his head. "There will be other parties, ok? Luke will understand, someone has a party every couple of weeks, there will be other chances to see my friends; right now you're going through a rough time, and just like I would for any of my other friends, I want to be here for you."

"What if I want to be left alone for awhile?" Shane asked. "What if I want you to go so that I can have some time to myself?"

"Is that really what you want?" Jason asked.

"No," Shane sighed.

"Ok, so my parents left cash, we can order in, grab the movie and pick up the food, make a night of this and get you feeling a little bit better."

"No, Jason, go to the party, please?" Shane looked at Jason pleadingly.

"No." Jason shook his head and pulled out his phone, dialing quickly. "Luke, hey it's Jason. I'm not gonna be able to make it tonight, I have something that I have to do…no, something that I care about broke and I want to fix it before I lose all of the pieces, you know? Yeah, I'll totally be there next time, I promise, just can't make this one…thanks Luke, have a good time, talk to you later." Jason snapped the phone shut and looked at Shane. "There," he smiled. "Now let's go take that take-out menu by force."

***

About an hour and a half later they were parked in front of the TV in the living room surrounded by empty or mostly empty cartons of Chinese food and a half eaten bag of Sour Patch Kids. Both boys were pressed on the left side of the sofa with Arnold squished between them. "Mitchie said that you liked to sing along, was she just fucking around?" Jason asked, looking at Shane as Satine nearly fell off of the elephant, surprised by Christian.

"No, that's uh…kinda true," Shane shrugged.

"Sing with me." Jason stood up, offering a hand to help Shane get to his feet.

"What? No." Shane shook his head.

"What, are you embarrassed? Come on, I'll be doing it to and there's no one else here, plus, Mitchie said you had a good voice, I want to hear it, you can sing either part."

"I don't-"

"It might make you feel better," Jason said, his sing-song voice tempting Shane.

"Fine," Shane slowly stood. "I do better with Satine's part, just please, _please _don't make fun of me," Shane looked pained as he stood in front of Jason.

"Don't worry about it, I go all out, so don't _you _make fun of _me_."

"Shut up so we don't miss it," Shane let out a small snort of laughter as the opening notes to Elephant Love Medley began.

"I was made for loving you baby, you were made for loving me," Jason sang, jokingly pointing at Shane, who chuckled before coming in quietly with his own part.

"The only way of loving me baby, is to pay a lovely fee."

"Just one night, give me just one night!"

"There's no way, 'cause you can't pay."

"In the name of love! One night in the name of love!" Jason acted along with song, putting a melodramatic and almost comical passion into the words as he sank to his knees, looking up imploringly at Shane.

"You crazy fool, I won't give in to you!" Shane tried to hold back a chuckle.

"Don't leave me this way, I can't survive without your sweet love, oh baby, don't leave me this way…"

"You'd think that people would have had enough of silly love songs," Shane sang, taking the notes down an octave to make them easier to hit.

"I look around me, and I see it isn't so, oh no."

"Some people want to fill the world with silly love songs."

"Well what's wrong with that? I'd like to know, 'cause here I go, yeah!" Jason got to his feet and jumped onto the couch, now singing down to Shane. "Love lifts us up where we belong, where eagles fly on a mountain high!"

"Love makes us act like we are fools, throw our lives away from one happy day." Shane added his own acting to it, rolling his eyes at Jason's pleading.

"We could be heroes...just for one day."

"You, you will be mean." Shane turned away from Jason in the spirit of the song

"No, I won't!" Jason shook his head.

"And I, I'll drink all the time!"

"We should be lovers!" Jason jumped down from the couch, putting his hand on Shane's shoulder, forcing him to turn around.

"We can't do that." Shane pulled away from Jason.

"We should be lovers, and that's a fact." This time Jason took Shane's hand, turning him around again.

"Though nothing would keep us together…"

"We could steal time," Jason sang.

"Just for one day." Shane's voice joined Jason's, and surprisingly to both boys, the composite sounded good. Really good. "We could be heroes, forever and ever, we could be heroes, forever and ever, we can be heroes..."

"Just because I," Jason belted. "Will always love you."

"I," Shane held the note out, supporting Jason's words.

"Can't help loving you," they sang together again, looking into each other's eyes, Jason stepping a little bit closer.

"You," Jason whispered the next line, holding it out while Shane came in.

"How wonderful life is," Shane sang softly, his heart feeling constricted inside of his chest.

"Now you're in the world." Jason's voice joined Shane's for a final time and both boys held the notes out, matching the actor's on screen. They weren't paying attention to Nicole and Ewan, at that moment, it was just Jason and Shane, and as the song came to a close, Jason's hand, - the one that wasn't holding Shane's, rose to the back of Shane's neck, gently guiding Shane into a soft, gentle kiss. "Shit, I'm sorry," Jason pulled away, jumping back a couple of feet. "I was just caught up in the whole movie moment thing." His voice was harried, his heart beating an odd combination of too fast one second and not at all the next.

"Yeah, no, I was just following the uh, the script." Shane backed up a little, his eyes wide, and ran his fingers nervously through his hair.

"Great," Jason nodded.

"Great," Shane agreed.

"Not great," Jason shook his head.

"No." Shane shook his as well, and before either of the boys really knew what they were doing, they were back in the center of the room, Jason's arms around Shane's slender waist, Shane's wrapped around Jason's neck, lips searching awkwardly, hungrily for the perfect kiss.


	13. Chapter 13

"No, I can't do this," Jason pulled away from Shane. "I'm sorry, I can't take advantage of you like this, you're too special." Jason shook his head, backing away towards the couch.

"What?" Shane looked at Jason, confused.

"You're vulnerable, Shane. You've been through so much and just today you got a nasty visit from the past, I can't let myself be that guy who jumps in and takes advantage of the broken kid."

"Do you like me?" Shane asked, looking at Jason, his brow furrowed in thought.

"Yes," Jason nodded, for the first time sure of his answer. He fell back on the couch, letting out a deep sigh.

"What if I don't think you're taking advantage of me?" Shane asked, biting his lower lip. "What if I think that you've shown me the most genuine humanity of anyone since my parents…" he trailed off. "And what if I like you too?"

"I don't know," Jason shrugged. "I've never been in a situation like this."

"Me neither," Shane sat down on the couch, giving Jason his space. Automatically, Jason picked up the bag of Sour Patch Kids and handed it to Shane, who took one, absentmindedly chewing it before turning to Jason. "Look, I'm fragile, yes, but you're not taking advantage of me." Shane scooted a little closer to Jason. "I like you, Jason, I liked kissing you, and I think you want me too."

"I do," Jason admitted.

"There is only one thing that I want from you, and you can say no, I understand."

"Ok," Jason nodded. "What?"

"If I trust you with me, will you hurt me?"

"God no," Jason shook his head. "I wouldn't do that, couldn't do that, not if I wanted too."

"Then don't try to push me away," Shane whispered. "Whatever these feelings are, yeah, I've had them before, so I know them and I know better than to pretend that they aren't there. I know you're gay, and well, after today, my secret's out, so-"

"Shane," Jason looked at Shane. "Will you go out with me?"

"Yeah," Shane nodded. "And I know what I want to do for our first date."

"What's that?" Jason asked, smiling as he took Shane's hand.

"I want to go to Luke's party."

"No, Shane, you don't, you're just saying that because you think I want to go, really, I'm fine here with you and the movie."

"I want to go," Shane shook his head. "I feel a million times better, you have no idea, and I really, really just want to get out of this house and do something fun."

"If you're sure," Jason said, trying to bite back a smile.

"I'm sure, there's just one other thing."

"Yeah?"

"I want to see the whole Jason, the one your mom mentioned, she said you were holding back to make me feel comfortable, and I think I'd rather see you for who you are."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," Shane nodded.

"Ok,"" Jason smiled. "I'm gonna go change, if you want you can too, but you look fine."

"I'll change." Shane stood up. "Should we clean up?" he asked, looking at the Chinese containers."

"When we get back," Jason shrugged and began to head upstairs. He opened his drawers, pushing away the black clothing that had risen to the top since Shane had arrived, selecting a bright green t-shirt and jeans with a rip in the knee. He paired the outfit with red converse and a blue sweatshirt. Once he put on the clothing, he checked the mirror. "Needs a hat," he said to himself before heading to the closet. He chose a baseball cap that had been white up until a few weeks ago when he, Sander and a couple of their other friends had decided to have a bit of a splatter painting party (in which more paint ended up on them then on the clothes they were painting). He put the cap on, moving the Shane so that it was just a little off center, grabbed his keys and headed downstairs.

Shane took longer. He knew that he wanted to change because he wanted to look good, but when he got to his room, he found it harder to find clothes that looked really good with long sleeves to hide his bruises. "Black," he sighed as he went through his drawer. "So much fucking black." He liked black, but he also like to accentuate it with reds or sometimes blue or green. He found a pair of light jeans that fit him well and pulled then on before rooting around for a shirt that would hide is injuries. "Black…" he sighed as he pulled out a long sleeved black shirt. It was a tight fit, clinging to his thin frame. He ran a comb through his long hair and turned too look in the mirror. He looked in the mirror as little as possible, and as he saw his reflection now, the scar on his jaw made him ill. "Too dark," he muttered as he began to rifle through his drawers for a different shirt. He extracted a short sleeved red t-shirt with the Ramones crest in the center, headlined by bold black letters reading the name of the aforementioned band. He nodded approvingly, threw on a pair of black converse, and headed down the stairs to see Jason waiting for him, dressed in an explosion of color. "Holy shit!" Shane's eyes widened as he saw Jason.

"Sorry," Jason licked his lips. "If it's too much, I can…it's just that this is how I normally dress."

"Don't change," Shane shook his head, smiling as he walked towards Jason. "You look good, really good. If this is the real you, bring it on."

"Thanks," Jason smiled. "But you have no idea what you just got yourself into."

"I can handle it," Shane shrugged. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yeah," Jason nodded. "Are you sure that you want to do this?"

"Yes," Shane rolled his eyes. "Stop worrying about me, I was fucked up, you helped me out, now I just want to go to the fucking party."

"Alright," Jason turned and opened the door, holding it for Shane before exiting himself. "God, I feel like a lame date," Jason said as they walked towards his car. "I mean I would have totally picked you up, but you live in my house."

"You're not lame," Shane shook his head as he moved to open the passenger seat door. "What are you doing?" Shane watched as Jason cut in front of him, opening the door for him.

"Trying to salvage any romantic potential this lame date has."


	14. Chapter 14

When they arrived at Luke's party, it was almost in full swing. Sure, it was still early, but Luke started early and went long into the night. "Hey!" Luke opened the door himself, a grin spreading across his face. "I thought you weren't gonna make it!"

"He fixed what was broken," Shane shrugged.

"Oh my god!" Luke looked taken aback. "It talks!"

"Shut up," Jason rolled his eyes, pushing past Luke. Last year – last week, even, the friction of their bodies so much as _brushing _together would have doubled Jason's heart rate, but not anymore, not now that Shane was in his life.

"Does it drink?" Luke asked, grabbing two beers from the table.

"Only soda," Shane said, catching Jason's glance. They had established on the way up that neither would drink, because Jason had to drive, so he couldn't, and Shane would feel bad drinking if Jason wasn't going to.

"Flynn?" Luke offered a beer to Jason.

"Not tonight, its Nate's night to drink, my night to drive; he here yet?"

"Yeah," Luke nodded, setting the beers back down, only to have them immediately snapped up by a couple of people Jason didn't know. "Soda's in the fridge, Nate's with his gal in the living room or out back. You on the prowl?"

"Nah," Jason shook his head, reaching for the hand dangling at Shane's side. "I brought a date and there's no way that I'm leaving him to be snapped up by someone else." He laced his fingers through Shane's, and Shane smiled shyly, dropping his eyes to the ground. He and Andy hadn't been all that public at first, as it was Shane's first relationship and he wanted to take it slow.

"Oh Jason," Luke shook his head, mocking his friend. "You said he wasn't your type!"

"Eh," Jason shrugged. "I think I was wrong." He gave Shane's hand a small squeeze, and Shane felt his heart rate increase just a little.

"Congratulations, Flynn," Luke patted Jason on the back. "I know that it's been awhile since you had someone, your standards are just so high."

"Or maybe I was just hung up on someone, eh?" Jason tilted his head to the side, once and for all testing to see if Luke knew about his long-standing, now ending crush.

"Jason…" Luke shook his head, and Jason could tell that Luke was begging him not to start this. He had known. The whole fucking time. Well at least he still wanted to be friends. At any rate, it didn't matter now; Jason's feelings for Luke had diminished over time, and now that he had Shane, the crush seemed to dissipate instantly. "Go show your date a good time."

"Ok," Jason smiled and gently tugged on Shane's hand. "Come meet Nate."

"Sounds good," Shane nodded, suddenly very self conscious. There were people _everywhere_, he had a horrible, ugly scar on his face and he was on the arm of a boy who was bound to attract attention the second he walked into a room.

"Hey," Jason stopped Shane in the hallway and pulled him into the coat closet. He shut the door, ignoring the random catcall from someone in the hallway who was probably already well on their way to a stomach pumping. "You ok?"

"Yeah, fine," Shane nodded. "Why?"

"You're tense," Jason observed. "I felt your hand tighten while we were walking, didn't seem calm."

"Oh, I'm ok," Shane let out a deep breath. "I'm just a little nervous."

"Why?" Jason smiled as he looked at Shane through the nearly dark but surprisingly spacious area.

"These are your friends, I'm afraid that they won't like me, that I'll repel them or something, or I dunno, make them feel weird."

"These are the most accepting bunch of freaks I've ever met," Jason chuckled. "You don't have to worry about them liking you, they will, they like everybody – well, almost everybody, but you're nothing like the people they hate."

"But Luke-"

"Luke likes you, Shane," Jason tilted his head to the side. "You couldn't tell?"

"He was…" Shane licked his lips nervously. "Jason, he was staring at my scar."

"Oh Shane," Jason took a step closer to Shane and pushed back the boy's thick hair. "You're beautiful, ok?" he leaned in and placed a soft kiss to the center of the scar. "This doesn't make that any different."

"It's hideous," Shane shook his head

"It's _you_," Jason insisted, taking Shane's hand again. "And it's beautiful, just like the rest of you, ok?" Jason looked into Shane's eyes, as they were now adjusting to the dark. "Luke was looking at you the way he was not because of your scar, but because he and I both know that you're way out of my league," Jason whispered. "I'm just glad that you haven't figured it out yet."

"I'm not out of your league," Shane shook his head. "I'm a pitiful wreck who-" Jason stopped Shane by gently placing his hand over the boy's mouth.

"You're not, Shane," Jason shook his head. "You're not pitiful, you're not a wreck, and you're not just a boy who's afraid of the dark. You're nice and gentle and gorgeous and stronger than anyone I've ever met. Why do I keep having to tell you this? What is it going to take for you to see in yourself the person that I see?"

"I could ask the same of you," Shane said, pushing Jason's hand away. "You think that I'm this great person for making it through all this, but don't you get it? You're the person leading me. You've bent over backwards to be nice to me and to make sure that I'm doing alright, and as much as I hate that it's true, I don't think that I would be doing alright without you."

"Well I'll be out there with you," Jason said, again taking Shane's hand firmly in his own. "So what do you say? Let's go have a good time."

"Ok," Shane gulped as Jason pushed the closet door open.

"Hey," Jason leaned into Shane as they re-entered the hallway. "Permanecer fuerte, novio."

"Novio?" Shane looked up at Jason. "Really?"

"Shit, you speak Spanish?" Jason asked, gulping.

"Yeah," Shane nodded. "Three years so far, you?"

"Since the 4th grade."

"How have I lived with you for a week and not known this?" Shane muttered.

"It's been a long week," Jason reasoned.

"True, but still…" Shane trailed off, unable to forget the single word. "What you just said, Jason, was it just a comforting term or do you actually want it?"

"Shane," Jason smiled, taking a nervous breath none the less. "I want you to be my boyfriend."

"Good," Shane smiled, moving just a little closer to Jason as they walked. "'Cause I want that too."

* * *

_**A/N I finally got around to posting a picture of Luke on my profile AS WELL as pictures for some of their schoolmates who have yet to come in yet - I recommend just looking at Luke for now, though.**_


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N I am so, so sorry guys...I thought that I had updated because it's been a long week, and then, after I moved to my dad's house, leaving all of my writing files at my mom's for three days, I was informed that I hadn't. This was the soonest I could update and I'm so, so sorry.**_

_**-Havah**_

**_Oh, and remember, there are pictures of all of the new characters on my profile!_**

_**

* * *

**_

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" A fairly short boy with a solid but not overweight build stopped Jason. "Did I just hear you say that you have a boyfriend?"

"Oh, uh," Jason shrugged. "Yeah."

"Since when do you commit to a relationship on the first date? At least this better be the first date, because I've never heard of this fucker. So yeah, since when do you get tied down?"

"Says the freshman, well, sophomore to be crushing on the senior?" Jason asked skeptically.

"Hey," the boy sighed. "I'm gonna tell him tonight!"

"Then you're gonna need all the help you can get, here." Jason grabbed a shot glass out of the hand of a random passer-by and handed it to the boy, who downed it immediately.

"Thanks, but I'm gonna need more than that, so I'll catch you later." The boy walked off, leaving Shane to look confused.

"That was Sander," Jason said. "He's half drunk already, poor kid. He's head over heels for my friend Barron."

"Is Barron head over heels back?" Shane asked.

"Yup," Jason chuckled. "But Sander doesn't know it. Nate and I are waiting for him to tell Barron, because it's Sander and he will, tonight I guess, once he's got enough liquor in him, and Barron'll drive him home because he doesn't drink, and ask him about it in the morning. It'll work out for them."

"That's kinda romantic."

"I know, Nate and I have been planning it out for awhile," Jason shrugged. "Oh, hey, look, speak of the devil." He pointed out onto the back deck of Luke's gigantic house. "That's Nate, and the girl he's with is Caitlyn, his recent girlfriend."

"Got it," Shane nodded, pushing his hair down in front of his scarring wound.

"Shane," Jason shook his head. "Nate and Caitlyn aren't going to give a fuck if you've got a scar, ok?" Jason caressed the back of Shane's hand with the pad of his thumb. Shane nodded and allowed Jason to lead him out onto the deck. "Ry," Jason came up on his friend from behind, standing to Nate's right and tapping the boy's left shoulder.

"Huh?" Nate turned to his left, slightly confused before looking to the other side. "Oh, hey asshole," he greeted. Caitlyn stifled a laugh at her boyfriend's momentary confusion.

"This is Shane," Jason said, letting go of Shane's hand and patting him gently on the back. "Shane, this is the lovely Caitlyn and her burnout boyfriend Nate."

"Fuck you very much, Flynn," Nate shot back, an amiable smile on his face.

"I know you would like to, but I'm taken, and apparently unlike you, I intend to remain faithful." Jason smiled innocently at Nate.

"I'm plenty loy- wait, since when are you taken?!" Nate's eyes widened as Jason's words kicked in like the four advil that would be attacking his bad hangover headache the next morning.

"Just tonight," Jason shrugged.

"Well where the fuck is he, Don Juan?" Nate looked around. "Is he here? He's here, right?"

"Um, Nate?" Caitlyn put her hand on Nate's knee. "I think that he might be talking about that Shane kid you, you know, the cute one who's standing, oh, _right_ next to him?"

"Nah, can't be," Nate shook his head, confident in his reply. "That guy's way out of Jason's league."

"Ok, Ry, you might not have noticed, but Jason's sexy, and unlike you, he's a generally good guy," Caitlyn reasoned.

"Um, hey, right behind you guys, just so you know." Jason cleared his throat, rolling his eyes as the couple turned around. "And Nate, take a look at the goddess sitting next to you; now try and tell me that _she's _not out of _your _league without any of us laughing at you."

"Is that your way of telling me that you're with Shane?" Nate asked.

"Yeah," Jason nodded, smiling. Shane was again glad for his long hair as he felt his ears begin to grow hot.

"Hey, Shane," Caitlyn stood gracefully, her short black skirt swishing mid thigh as she did so. "Let's give these idiots a minute to chat, besides, I could use a drink." She linked her arm through Shane's, and he walked with her back into the crowded house.

"Hey," Jason took Caitlyn's place on the bench. "I wasn't hiding him from you, I promise." Jason looked down at his watch. "I kissed him for the first time about 45 minutes ago, asked him out about 37 minutes ago and told him that I wanted him to be my boyfriend about six minutes ago."

"Wow, talk about your expedited shipping," Nate joked.

"Shut up."

"Ok, let's be serious for about two seconds, yeah?"

"Ok," Jason nodded.

"Jason, he's hot, I'll give you that, but you said so yourself, his parents are dead man, he can't be ok yet." Nate sighed. "Just don't take this too quickly, because he's living in your house, right?"

"Yeah," Jason nodded.

"If you screw things up with him, you still have to see him every day and it's gonna be just like it was when Luke started dating Patrick; it's gonna feel like someone's brutally wrenching your heart out with a fucking monkey wrench."

"Ok, Nate, the gory details are unnecessary," Jason interrupted. "And don't worry, I care for him, I really do; I won't let myself fuck things up. The last thing that he needs is for one more thing to go breaking his heart."

"Who are you and what have you done with the Jason who's been lusting after Luke Warner for almost four years?"

"I dunno," Jason shrugged, smiling slightly. "I think that he just fell for someone who actually needed him; for once the person I want wants me too, and it feels fucking great to know that I can be there for him."

"That's really-" Nate was interrupted as Shane came back onto the back deck, his eyes wide, Caitlyn jogging after him.

"Shane?" Jason stood up, immediately concerned. "What's wrong?"

"Daniel's here," Shane said through clenched teeth. He looked an odd mixture of scared and angry, and Jason moved closer, putting a hand on Shane's shoulder.

"Who's Daniel?"

"Daniel Reisz, he's Andy's best friend."


	16. Chapter 16

"Oh shit," Jason bit his bottom lip. "Ok, we should leave, come on." He took Shane's hand and began to walk, but Shane stayed still.

"No," Shane shook his head. "I keep running away from everything, you want to be here, there's no reason why I shouldn't be able to stay at the party just because he's here. He didn't see me, so it's ok."

"Are you sure?" Jason asked, turning back around to face Shane.

"Yes." Shane nodded.

"Ok," Jason smiled, giving Shane a simple one-armed hug. "Just let me know when you want to go, ok? The only thing that I really have to do is drive Nate home if he drinks too much, which he will, simply because he can." Shane smiled slightly and Jason chuckled as Nate glared at him.

"Don't be sour," Caitlyn rolled her eyes, setting her drink under the bench and taking a seat on Nate's lap. "I don't like it when you're sour," she whispered, leaning in to kiss him.

"Well that's all she wrote," Jason rolled his eyes. "Once Nate gets started, he goes for awhile, and I don't know about you, but watching my best friend and his gal make out is rather low on my list of things that make a night fun."

"Agreed," Shane nodded, clearly trying to hide the fact that he was still shaken up by the one sided run-in with Daniel.

"Want to go explore the rest of the party?" Jason asked, tilting his head and looking at Shane sideways. "There are plenty of drunk people to make fun of."

"Sure," Shane shrugged. "Sounds good." Again, Shane allowed Jason to take his hand, and he followed the taller boy through the crowd of people.

"JASON!" A boy with brown hair and a huge grin on his face threw himself into Jason with such force that Jason not only lost his hold on Shane's hand, but stumbled backwards a few feet. The boy's arms latched around Jason's waist, hugging him tightly.

"Um, hi Altan," Jason said, trying to push the boy off of him. Shane just stood there, his eyes wide, not totally sure how to react.

"Altan," another boy came up next to them, this one moving slower, his voice quieter. "Let go," he commanded gently.

"NOPE! SNUGGLES!" Altan burrowed his face into Jason's chest.

"Altan, I'm getting jealous," the other boy said. Shane saw Altan's eyes widen immediately and he let go of Jason, running back to the other boy and putting his arm around him.

"Thanks Chris," Jason said with a smile. "He has a death grip."

"Believe me, I know," Chris nodded, smiling as Altan began to place kisses on Chris's neck.

"He's acting weirder than normal," Jason mused. "Did someone give him alcohol?"

"Worse," Chris shook his head. "Mountain Dew."

"Oh shit," Jason chuckled. "Caffeine _and _sugar, dude, Chris, you're screwed."

"I can handle it," Chris shrugged. "Who's your friend?" he said, jerking his head towards Shane.

"This is Shane," Jason said, putting his arm casually over Shane's shoulders. "Shane, this is Chris, and the thing attacking him is Altan."

"Hey," Shane shook Chris's hand.

"Sorry about Altan," Chris laughed. "He's hyper enough without help…but here, watch this." Chris turned, facing Altan as best he could. "Altan, sit." The boy obeyed, dropping to the floor and sitting on his knees, looking up adoringly at Chris. "Stay," Chris commanded as he walked over to Jason and Shane. "Come," he said, laughing as Altan got to his feet and bounded over.

"Wow," Jason chuckled. "Does he roll over?"

"Yeah," Chris laughed. "He plays de-"

"How did you get him to do that?" Jason said, interrupting Chris before he could mention death in any form. Luckily enough, Shane was too caught up in the fact that Altan was actually acting like a puppy to hear Chris's near mistake.

"I told him that if he did exactly what I told him to, we could go skinny dipping later."

"Whore," Jason chuckled.

"Oh, I'm not actually going to do it," Chris shook his head. "He's going to crash in about," Chris looked at his watch. "35 minutes, and then I'll have to have Spin help me get him home, and in the morning, the deal will have expired."

"You're conniving," Jason nodded. "I like the way you think."

"You might not want to talk like that with your new boy right next to you," Chris pointed out.

"How did you know?" Jason asked, looking at Shane, who looked just as surprised as he felt.

"I've known you for awhile, Jason, and you're fucking glowing, besides, that's the only way that a boy that good looking would still be hanging around this hallway, what with Altan as out of control as he is."

"Why does everyone keep saying that I'm good looking?" Shane asked, whispering in Jason's ear so that Chris couldn't hear.

"Because," Jason kissed Shane just behind his ear, whispering back. "You are good looking."

"Jason-"

"Best looking guy in the place," Jason smiled, sliding his arm around Shane's waist. "And everybody knows it."

"Don't say that, it isn't true."

"It is to me," Jason kissed Shane's cheek. "Stop being so down on yourself, it's not worth it, let loose, have a little fun."

"Ok," Shane nodded. "I'll try."

"That's all I ask."

"Altan!" Chris, who had been attempting to wriggle out of Altan's grip, pointed down the hallway. "Sprite, go." Altan nodded and headed off towards the kitchen. "Well it was good to see you," Chris smirked. "I'm gonna go hide in the closet, see how long it takes for him to find me."

"You're cruel," Jason shook his head.

"I'll give him his seven minutes in heaven if he finds me," Chris shrugged, slipping into the closet.

"They're weird," Jason chuckled. "Been together since fucking kindergarten and they've never once had sex, Altan's waiting for marriage, or commitment, in their case."

"Cute," Shane smiled. "I thought he was gonna take you down back there."

"So did I," Jason admitted. "If he had been just a little bit taller, he probably would have. He does stuff like that a lot, usually when Chris's withholding snuggles."

"Why would he do that?" Shane asked.

"Chris doesn't really like to be touched all of the time, it's really just Altan who can touch him at all, but sometimes he won't let anyone go near him, it's just part of who he is, he likes his space."

"Hey," a voice behind them caused Jason and Shane to turn around. "Shane."

"Oh fuck," Shane whispered, moving closer to Jason.

"Daniel?" Jason asked. Shane just nodded.

"Hi," Daniel said.

"Um, hey," Shane gulped.

"I heard about your parents, how are things?"

"Oh, they're going," Shane shrugged. "You know, not great, but getting better."

"I'm sorry man."

"Thanks," Shane nodded.

"Andy is too, you know."

"Is he?" Jason asked, his words harsh and biting.

"Jason," Shane shook his head.

"Sorry," Jason retreated slightly, not wanting to make Shane any more tense than he was already.

"He is," Daniel nodded. "I don't want to come in and fuck up your life, you don't need that, so this is all that I'll say about it – he regrets what he did to you; he realizes that he threw away something great, and I think he'll understand if you don't, but if you can find it in your heart to forgive him…"

"I'm over it," Shane said, turning and walking from the room without another word.


End file.
